Education themed jokes:

1. Dad puts finger print(Thumb) on son's mark sheet.

Child asked father:
Being a chartered accountant,
Why did you put finger print instead of signature on my progress card.

Father replied:
idiot,after looking at your marks, the teacher should not think that I am educated.

2. Critical thinking among children:

Pintu: daadi neend nhi aa rahi, TV dekh lun?

Daadi: mujh se baat kr le

Pintu: daadi kya hum hamesha 6 hi rahenge?
Aap, mom, dad, didi, main aur meri billi

Daadi: nahi beta aapke liye kal doggy b aa raha h to 7 ho jaayenge

Pintu: par doggy to billi ko kha jayega fir 6 ho jaayenge

Daadi: nahi beta aap ki shaadi ho jaayegi to 7 ho jaayenge

Pintu: fir behen chali jaayegi shaadi kr ke to fir 6 ho jaayenge

Daadi: beta fir aapka beta ho jaayega to fir 7 ho jaayenge

Pintu: tb tk aap mar jaaogi to fir hum wapas se 6 ho jaayenge

Daadi: Bewqauf......jaa TV dekh

3. Once upon a time ..a small boy named Basheer lived in a tiny Moroccan village. All his classmates hated him for his stupidity especially his teacher who was always yelling at him "you are driving me crazy, *Basheer*"...

One day his mother went to check out how he is doing at school and the teacher told her honestly that her son is simply a disaster, getting very low marks and never had she seen such a dumb boy in her whole career...

The mother could not accept such a feedback and she took her son out from that school and she even shifted to another city ...

25 years later, that teacher got a cardio disorder and all the doctors advised her to go for an open heart operation which only one surgeon could perform in another city.

Left with no other choice she did it and the surgery was successful...when she opened her eyes, she saw a handsome doctor smiling at her, being under anesthesia effect, she wanted to thank him but could not talk.........in turn, the doctor was staring at her face which started turning blue. She was raising her hand trying to tell him something but in vain and eventually she died.....

The doctor was shocked and was trying to understand what just happened, till he turned back and saw *Basheer* working as a cleaner in that hospital who unplugged the ventilator to connect his vacuum cleaner......

If you were thinking that *Basheer* became a doctor, it's because you have been watching too many Indian movies, serials or have read too many motivational forwarded messages...
*Basheer* is still *Basheer*

4. When I was in class 7 I used to ask a lot of questions.

One Day I decided to ask one ms. Smith this question.

ME: Well, in pronunciation we ignore some letters eg letter 'H' in Hour, Honest, Honor.. E.t.c, Why?

Ms. Smith: Not ignoring, they are considered silent.

(I was even more confused) (after class, the teacher asked me to heat her packed lunch for her in the microwave in the cafeteria. I ate all the food and returned an empty hotpot.

Ms. Smith: What happened... I told you to go and HEAT my food??

ME: Mmmmh Madam I thought 'H' was silent

5. Father:What happened to your results?

Son: I have been NEWZEALANDED.

Father: What?!!!! What do you mean?

Son : Dad, Myself and another boy both scored exactly same marks. But, he was given 1st Rank, while I got 2nd.

Father: This is ridiculous. If marks are equal, then both should have been declared Joint 1st Rank Holders na? By the way, how come he got 1st Rank? On what basis?

Son : I checked that too. Principal said it was decided based on how many additional sheets were taken by us while writing the exams. He had taken more than me. So.....

Father: 🤔😮😲😠😡

6. Teacher addresses a student and asks: “How many kidneys do we have?"
“Four!", The student responds.
“Four? Haha,” The teacher was one of those who took pleasure in picking on his students' mistakes and demoralizing them.

“Bring a bundle of grass, because we have an ass in the room," the teacher orders a front bencher.
“And for me a coffee!”, the student added.
The teacher was furious and expelled the student from the room.

The student was, by the way, the humorist Aparicio Torelly Aporelly (1895-1971), better known as the "Baron de Itararé".

On his was out of the classroom, the student still had the audacity to correct the furious teacher:
"You asked me how many kidneys‘ we have." ‘We have four: two of mine and two of yours. ‘We have’ is an expression used for the plural. Enjoy the grass".

😂😂

7. *When I was in class 7 , I used to ask a lot of questions. .....!*

*One day, I asked my English Teacher, "Why do we ignore some letters in pronunciation eg. the letter H .......in Hour, Honour. .....etc. ......??????*

*My English Teacher said, " We are not ignoring them; they're considered silent ".......*

*(I was even more confused .....?????)*

*During the lunch break, my Teacher gave me her packed lunch and asked me to heat it in the Cafeteria.*

*I ate all the food and returned her the empty container. ....!!!!!!!*

*My English Teacher : What happened? I told you to go and HEAT my food, you are returning me an empty container.*

*I replied, "Madam, I thought 'H' was silent. 😛*

*Dedicated to all English Teachers.😂🤣😝*

8).......

Early morning a mother went to her sleeping son and woke him up, “Wake up, son. It’s time to go to school.”

SON : “Awww Mom! I don’t want to go to school.”

MOM : “Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go to school.”

SON :

“One, all the children hate me.

Two, all the teachers hate me.”

MOM : “Oh! that’s not a reason. Come on, you have to go to school.”

SON : “ OK. You give me two good reasons WHY I should go to school?”

MOM :

One,

you are FIFTY-TWO years old,

And should understand your responsibilities.

Two.....

You are the PRINCIPAL of the school "😂😄😁😜

9).....

Sarita is a very good teacher in the school ... and was teaching students .....

Sarita: - Tell me where is the Taj Mahal .... 🕌

Students: Agra ...

Sarita : Wrong ... It's in Delhi...

The students all got into thinking .. and were confused

😮😲

The students told this thing to their parents.

The very next day, all the parents reached the school and started complaining to Sarita teacher that why are you teaching the children wrong ..

Sarita to all the parents: First of all you should deposit the fees of the last six months 💰

Till the fees are deposited.

Taj Mahal will remain in Delhi ……

🤣😂

10... That's your problem:

Classroom: A place where the primary goal is not to fill a bucket, but to light a fire-

- ### The Light in Their Eyes Do you remember it? That spark. The unbridled curiosity of a child who asks "why" for the tenth time, not to be difficult, but because their world is a universe of wonders waiting to be discovered. The five-year-old who spends an entire afternoon building a lopsided castle of mud and leaves, not for a grade, but for the sheer joy of creating. The eight-year-old who reads under the covers with a flashlight, lost in a world far beyond their bedroom walls. This is the light. It is the raw engine of passion, the bedrock of innovation, and the very soul of a lifelong learner. And I fear, with every fibre of my being, that our schools are becoming places where this light goes to die. Source: Gemini AI We have, with the best of intentions, built a system that mistakes measurement for meaning. We have created a world within classroom walls where the landscape is paved with textbooks and the horizon is blocked by the looming shadow of the next exam. Chi...

Discipline rooted in connection builds emotional safety and also encourages internal motivation:

- *“Discipline isn’t about control. It’s about connection.”* _This powerful statement shifts the traditional perspective of discipline from authority-based control to relationship-based guidance. True discipline is not about instilling fear or asserting dominance, it’s about helping someone grow by building trust, understanding, and connection._ 🧠 What It Means: • Control-based discipline says: “Do what I say, or face punishment.” • Connection-based discipline says: “I understand what you’re going through. Let’s learn from this together.” The goal is not to force obedience but to nurture self-discipline, empathy, and responsibility. 🌱 *_Example 1: A School Principal & a Misbehaving Student*_ • Control Approach: The principal suspends the student without asking why he was misbehaving. • Connection Approach: The principal calls the student in, sits beside him, and says, “You’re usually respectful. What happened today? Is something bothering you?” 🔁 *Outcome:* ...

The Blueprint for Global Learning: Aligning Outcomes, Curriculum, and Assessment for a Brighter Future:

- From the bustling classrooms of a city to the remote learning hubs across continents, education stands as humanity's most powerful tool for progress. It is the engine of innovation, the guardian of culture, and the pathway to individual and collective fulfillment. Yet, the true potential of any educational system, anywhere in the world, hinges on a fundamental, often overlooked, principle: the seamless alignment of learning outcomes, curriculum, and assessment. This isn't merely an academic ideal; it's the indispensable blueprint for designing, delivering, and systematically evaluating an education system that genuinely serves its purpose. The Three Pillars of Purposeful Learning Imagine education as a purposeful journey. Learning Outcomes are our destination . They are the clear, measurable statements that define what learners are truly expected to know, understand, and be able to do upon completing a course, a year, or an entire program. They articulate...

Acceptance is the warm embrace that tells a child, "You belong. You are enough"-

- The Echo of Belief: The Single Most Powerful Gift for a Child's Self-Esteem In the delicate, intricate process of a child's growth, while countless elements play a part – opportunities, friendships, achievements – there stands one truth above all, a singular, luminous thread that weaves resilience and confidence into the very fabric of their being. The single most important factor in maintaining a child’s self-esteem is the unwavering presence of an adult who consistently demonstrates respect and acceptance, and who provides support that powerfully conveys the message: "I believe in you." The Foundation of Respect and Acceptance Imagine a child, navigating a world filled with new challenges, unexpected failures, and a constant stream of information to process. In this evolving landscape, what they crave most, even before praise, is to be seen, to be heard, and to be accepted exactly as they are. When an adult – be it a parent, a teacher, a Mosi, or a Buwa – treat...

School Library suggested list for Indian schools for classes 6th to 10th standard:

## - Book Suggestions for a School Library in India for classes 6-10. Here are some book suggestions, focusing on core subjects and Indian languages, to enrich your school library: 1. Works by renowned Indian authors in various languages (Hindi, english, regional languages etc.) 2. Language Reference Books: * Dictionaries (English, Hindi, regional languages) * Thesauruses * Grammar books * English communication books * Writing guides * Essay writing books 3. Science: * Biographies of famous scientists (e.g., Einstein, Curie) * Books on specific scientific topics (e.g., astronomy, biology, chemistry) 4. Mathematics: * Mathematical puzzles and brain teasers * History of mathematics * Books on the practical applications of mathematic...

ಪ್ರೊ. ಕೆ. ಎಸ್. ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್ ರವರ ಜೀವನ-

- ಪ್ರೊ. ಕೆ. ಎಸ್. ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್ ಪ್ರೊ.ಕೆ.ಎಸ್.ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್ (5 ಫೆಬ್ರುವರಿ 1936 - 3 ಮೇ 2020) ಕನ್ನಡದ ಪ್ರಮುಖ ಸಾಹಿತಿಗಳಾಗಿದ್ದರು. ಅವರ ಪೂರ್ಣ ಹೆಸರು 'ಕೊಕ್ಕರೆಹೊಸಳ್ಳಿ ಶೇಖಹೈದರ ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್'. ಅವರು ಬರೆದ 'ಜೋಗದ ಸಿರಿ ಬೆಳಕಿನಲ್ಲಿ ತುಂಗೆಯ ತೆನೆ ಬಳುಕಿನಲ್ಲಿ' ಎಂಬ ಪದ್ಯವು ಬಹಳ ಜನಪ್ರಿಯವಾಗಿ ಅವರು ನಿತ್ಯೋತ್ಸವ ಕವಿಯೆಂದೂ ಕರೆಯಲ್ಪಡುತ್ತಿದ್ದರು. Image source: Online typing ಜೀವನ- ಪ್ರೊ. ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್ ಬೆಂಗಳೂರು ಜಿಲ್ಲೆಯ ದೇವನಹಳ್ಳಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಫೆಬ್ರುವರಿ ೫, ೧೯೩೬ ರಲ್ಲಿ ಜನಿಸಿದರು. ೧೯೫೯ ರಲ್ಲಿ ಭೂವಿಜ್ಞಾನದಲ್ಲಿ ಸ್ನಾತಕೋತ್ತರ ಪದವಿ ಪಡೆದರು. ೧೯೯೪ ರ ವರೆಗೆ ವಿವಿಧ ಸರಕಾರಿ ಕಾಲೇಜುಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಅಧ್ಯಾಪಕ ಹಾಗು ಪ್ರಾಧ್ಯಾಪಕರಾಗಿ ಕೆಲಸ ಮಾಡಿ ನಿವೃತ್ತರಾದರು. ಜನನ 5 ಫೆಬ್ರುವರಿ 1936 ದೇವನಹಳ್ಳಿ, ಮೈಸೂರು ಸಂಸ್ಥಾನ, ಬ್ರಿಟಿಷ್ ಇಂಡಿಯಾ ಮರಣ 3 ಮೇ 2020 (ವಯಸ್ಸು 84)[೧] ಬೆಂಗಳೂರು ವೃತ್ತಿ ಸಾಹಿತಿ, ಪ್ರೊಫೆಸರ್ ಭಾಷೆ ಕನ್ನಡ ರಾಷ್ಟ್ರೀಯತೆ ಭಾರತ ಪ್ರಕಾರ/ಶೈಲಿ Fiction ಸಾಹಿತ್ಯ ಚಳುವಳಿ ನವ್ಯ ಕಾವ್ಯ ಪ್ರಮುಖ ಕೆಲಸಗಳು ಮನಸು ಗಾಂಧಿ ಬಜಾರು(1960) ನಿತ್ಯೋತ್ಸವ ಪ್ರಮುಖ ಪ್ರಶಸ್ತಿಗಳು ಪದ್ಮಶ್ರೀ (೨೦೦೮), ರಾಜ್ಯೋತ್ಸವ (೧೯೮೧) ಕೆಲವು ಸಾಹಿತ್ಯಗಳು : ನಿಸಾರ್ ಅಹಮದ್ ...

What is phonics in english and understanding Hauna phonics system:

HAUNA PHONICS HAUNA phonics is a systematic, child centred approach to teaching literacy skills. Children are taught the sounds of the letters in a specific order. Group 1- s, a, m, n, i, p, t Group 2-r, d, c, k, o, g, l Group 3- b, u, f, h, j, e, q Group 4- v, w, x, y, z, Group 5- ai, ee, ai, oa, ue Group 6- Ng, ch, th, ah, OO, oo Group 7-ou, oi, or, er, ar After completion of one group of letters, children are taught how to blend and read words. Words that do not follow the phonics principle are named as Comm. words or frequently used words. Children are taught four lists of Comm. words in H3. List 1 I, me, he, be, to, do, no List 2 We, was, has, is, his, so, us List 3 All, go, she, my, are, here, one List 4 The, them, there, those, this, those, that, then, there Click to see video of Sounds of phonics: Further reading: Understanding Phonics of English language: So, what exactly is phonics? Phonics invol...

Education system in Greece and Rome in ancient times: (In Urdu)-

یونان اور روم میں نظامِ تعلیم ڈاکٹر عرفان حبیب مغربی تعلیم کی تاریخ کا آغاز حضرت عیسیٰؑ سے سیکڑوں برس پہلے، یونانی قوم کی تعلیمی سرگرمیوں سے ہوتا ہے۔ اس تاریخ میں بیسویں صدی کی شروعات تک ایک تسلسل پایا جاتا ہے۔ ابتدائی دور میں یونانی شہری ریاستوں میں رہتے تھے۔ شروع ہی سے ان کے یہاں تعلیم کو بڑی اہمیت دی جاتی تھی۔ اچھے شہری تیار کرنے کے لیے تعلیم ضروری تھی۔ یہ ریاستیں دشمنوں میں گھری ہوئی تھیں اور اکثر اندرونی خطروں کا بھی سامنا کرنا ہوتا تھا۔ اس لیے شہریوں کی اس طرح سے تربیت ضروری تھی کہ وہ اندرونی اور بیرونی خطروں کا اچھی طرح مقابلہ کر سکیں۔ اس یونانی سماج کی بنیاد، غلامی کے نظام پر تھی جس میں غلاموں کی تعداد آزاد شہریوں سے کہیں زیادہ تھی۔ تجارت اور ہاتھ سے کام کرنے کو معیوب سمجھا جاتا تھا اور یہ کام غلاموں سے لیے جاتے تھے، اس لیے شہریوں کو کوئی ٹیکنیکل تعلیم حاصل کرنے کی ضرورت نہیں تھی۔ شہری ریاستیں کئی باتوں میں ایک دوسرے سے مختلف تھیں اور اس لیے ان کے تعلیم کے مقاصد بھی جدا جدا تھے مثلاً سپارٹا اور ایتھنز کے تعلیمی نظام بالکل الگ الگ تھے۔ سپارٹا کے شہری اپنے علاقے می...

WHAT STUDENTS CAN DO AND PERSUE THEIR FURTHER STUDIES AFTER 12th:

- After PUC 12th- WHAT STUDENTS CAN DO AND PERSUE THEIR FURTHER STUDIES AFTER 12th: - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - * Science Courses* (3 Years) Bsc Physics Bsc Chemistry Bsc Botany Bsc Zoology Bsc Computer science Bsc Mathematics Bsc PCM Bsc CBZ Bsc Forestry Bsc Dietician & Nutritionist Bsc Home Science Bsc Agriculture Science Bsc Horticulture Bsc Sericulture Bsc Oceanography Bsc Melsorology Bsc Arthopology Bsc Forensic Science Bsc Food technology Bsc Diary Technology Bsc Hotel Management Bsc Fashion Design Bsc Mass Communication Bsc Electronic Media Bsc Multimedia Bsc 3D Animation * Commerce Courses* CA Chartered Account CMA Cost Management Account CS Company Secretary (Foun...

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