It is about how we can interact with a child or a group of children in so many different ways so that we value add to the child, we enrich his or her life and our's too. Please note the idea here is not to find a better way of facilitating, rather explore and learn multiple ways of interacting, so that we can at any moment, decide which one to use. So when we would look into each master's work, we are going to see what alternatives are being offered, and collect them as more options in our journey with children.
The BEST way to Facilitate is the WORST way to Facilitate!
A lot of teachers and parents come and ask us what is the best way to deal with xyz situation with a child, the best way to facilitate.
Some talk about the ‘Aarohi' way of responding to children - indicating that there is ‘right’ or ‘best’ way of facilitating – that we (at aarohi) use, which is eluding them.
Some teachers and parents even feel bad if they dealt with a child in a way contrary to what they think is the ‘best’ or prescribed way of facilitating or mentoring the child.
Also, many people are befuddled when they see seemingly contrary ‘ways’ exhibited by us. For the same situation - we would respond to different children differently and even the same child differently at different times. They expect consistency, what they get is confusing variety. They have read it in teaching books, in parenting guides – be consistent.
Some teachers and parents even feel bad if they dealt with a child in a way contrary to what they think is the ‘best’ or prescribed way of facilitating or mentoring the child.
Also, many people are befuddled when they see seemingly contrary ‘ways’ exhibited by us. For the same situation - we would respond to different children differently and even the same child differently at different times. They expect consistency, what they get is confusing variety. They have read it in teaching books, in parenting guides – be consistent.
But to us, this notion of a ‘best way’ of teaching or coaching or facilitating or parenting is not possible. For us, our profession or role itself means no one way, no right way, no best way. It stands rather for openness to experiment and explore:
- The moment I think that X way is the best way - I stagnate - I stop thinking of alternates / options. I stop learning. I become too narrow in my view.
- The moment I think that X way is the best way - I profess (if not the content) atleast that method, the X way. In which case I am no more facilitating, rather preaching.
- The moment I think that X way is the best way - I close myself - to understanding the child - for then I am with the ‘way’ and not with the child. Then the way or the method becomes more important than being with the child, understanding him or her.
To us facilitating means that we're constantly exploring and experimenting. That we fluctuate between all kinds of actions, all kinds of methods, all kinds of responses, is the essence of facilitation.
This can be confusing to others. However, if we're able to both - be aware of our facilitation (action) and be aware of what our facilitation did (response / consequence) - then this vicissitude adds immense richness to my (facilitator’s) understanding of the child.
We want to emphasise that this playing around (experimenting) with facilitation is not a way to hide one’s lack of consistency. Rather its an intentional drive to develop facilitation skills and to learn about the child by putting oneself in the challenge zone. This is because this variation comes with a constant play - not of actions per se - but a constant play of one’s beliefs.
In conclusion, a facilitator is somebody with the most dynamic belief system. Constantly questioning, challenging, playing around and changing with one’s beliefs. Which is why there is no best belief. Which is why there is no wrong way of facilitation. Which is why there is no best way.
Which is why we constantly yearn to learn from masters, from you!
Be ready to think, share, experiment and enjoy.
Source: The above excerpt is taken from the Arohilife online course response message.